We’ve all heard of breaking up to make up, but what happens when the relationship is just not progressing? Seventy percent of people who have been in a relationship that went nowhere say that they wish they had ended it sooner. That’s an alarming number when you think about it. There are many reasons people grow apart in relationships. Here are some of the most common reasons:
- Lack of communication: Lack of communication is one of the most common problems in relationships. There are many reasons why people don’t communicate effectively. Some people are afraid of conflict, while others are afraid of being judged. Some people are simply not good at expressing their feelings. When couples don’t communicate effectively, it can lead to misunderstandings, resentment, and ultimately, a sense of disconnection.
- Different life goals: As people grow and change, their goals and priorities may also change. If these changes are not in sync with each other, it can lead to conflict and eventually, a sense of growing apart.
- Unresolved conflict: When couples don’t address conflict head-on, it can fester and build up over time. This can lead to resentment, bitterness, and a general sense of negativity in the relationship.
- Lack of shared interests: When couples don’t have any shared interests or activities, it can make it difficult to connect with each other. This can lead to boredom, frustration, and eventually, a sense of growing apart. They should address shared interest at the very beginning. If you don’t have shared interests, you may need to consider whether you want to enter into the relationship.
- Infidelity: Infidelity is a major betrayal of trust that can be very difficult to overcome. It can be physical, emotional, or both. Physical infidelity is when a person engages in sexual activity with someone other than their partner. Emotional infidelity is when a person develops a close emotional relationship with someone other than their partner. Infidelity can lead to a sense of anger, hurt, and mistrust, which can make it difficult to rebuild the relationship.
- Financial status: Some couples may grow differently in their finances and may cause a conflict of lifestyles. For example, if one partner loses their job or has to take a pay cut, it can mean having to downsize your home, give up your hobbies, or even move in with family or friends. These changes can be difficult to adjust to, and they can put a strain on your relationship.
- Childbearing: Couples must be in unison regarding the decision to have or not have children. If they are not in unison, it can lead to conflicts. Decisions such as the number of children to have, how to raise the child and/or how to conceive the child can be issues that lead to growing apart. Some examples are:
- Schooling
- Religion
- Having a child in the traditional manner, surrogacy, adoption, In Vitro Fertilization (IVF)
If you are concerned that you and your partner may be growing apart, there are a few things you can do to reconnect. First, it is important to communicate openly and honestly with each other about your feelings. You should also try to spend more time together and do things that you both enjoy. If you are still struggling, it may be helpful to seek professional help from a couple’s therapist.
Relationships require an equal amount of effort from both people. ~Unknown.
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Check out Love & Lust by Gerald C. Anderson, Sr.